But I mean it this time!

Okay I need to crack the weight-loss whip on myself.  Seriously, enough joking around.  In one month, I will be going for my first dress fitting.  (AHHHH).  I haven’t scheduled it yet, but they said I should come the first week of June to start out.  Seriously?  Seriously?

Okay, okay I know you are probably saying “God you’ve been obsessing/talking about this for-ev-er” and yes, I hear that.  But the thing is - I was doing really good for a while, and I think I may have actually lost like A POUND and kept it off - and then just like that, poof - gone!  Motivation, out the window.  Determination, sayonara!   Not to say I’ve fallen off the wagon by any means, but before when I was all salads all the time, gym 4 days a week, etc etc etc is a bit different from now.   I mean, I’ll go to the gym but I’m pretty much just doing an hour of cardio and then I leave.  Before I’d get all into it and do weights and all sorts of shit, but I think I’m getting lazy (and D not going to the gym lately makes me feel like I have to rush through to get home, which I HAAATE!)

I can just feel the difference in me, which means I really have to remain conscious of it at all times.  I think that’s my biggest problem - I’ll eat a cookie or something and it won’t be until later that I’m like hmmm wait a minute this is contributing to the greater evil….

So, in continuing my month of enlightenment (and general lack of freakouts) I need to come up with a serious game plan.  I don’t want to spend the last 2 months before the wedding barely eating, working out way too much and generally having panic attacks.  [ugh, I bet I will anyway..]

My goals for the next month:  (we’ll take it step by step)
~Get to the gym 4 days a week.  On 3 of those days do a targeted weight-lifting session (arms, legs, butt, etc) - and include push-ups and sit-ups on all 3 workouts.   For 1 work-out, focus only on cardio and switch it up and keep it interesting.
~Do one of my 2 DVDs once a week (either yoga or the “wedding workout” one).  Can be done on a weekend if it makes it easier)
~Don’t make excuses.  When going to get a cookie or this or that, say in my head “Is that necessary right now” and if I can wait, then wait.  I’ve found when I hold off a bit - I tend to not even want it so much.  It needs to be more about being in the moment with the food/hunger then just scarfing it down.

I think these are all doable and something I just have to accomplish them.  I want to feel good when I put on that dress next month, and I want to be PROUD of myself.  Right now I’m ‘okay’, but I want to be great.  I want to feel like “HELL YES I CAN DO THIS” and mean it.  I need to gain back my determination.  It can happen, and it will make the route to wedding-ville a little less stressful as I go to work off the PITA wedding stuff.  (p.s. I love the abbreviation PITA for pain in the ass, hehe).

Happy Cinco de Mayo!  The new me continues…………….

p.s. why does WordPress show that any word with the ending “nth” is wrong??  Like “month” or “with”?  WTF?

May 5th:
I am grateful for my legs - they seem to be the first thing that tone up/show improvement when I get really active, and I don’t really have to work on them.  That means focusing on all the other not-so-perfect stuff is a little bit easier.